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April 28, 2025

Drawing from these diverse disciplines, she offers compassionate support that cushions the emotional strain and empowers her clients. We caught up with Lilia to learn more about her career and how she got where she is. 

Tell me about the first time you heard of or learned about the concept of a divorce doula. 

If I am being honest, I naively thought I made up the concept of a divorce doula myself. There are birth doulas and death doulas; it makes sense that there would be a divorce doula. Divorce is one of the most stressful experiences one can go through, and it’s hard to do the big things in life on your own. There are other professionals who help in limited ways. Lawyers practice law. Therapists provide emotional support. But what about all of the other things that come with divorce? There was a missing piece. 

What drew you to provide this service to people? 

I know that I wish I had someone to support and guide me through my own divorce: someone to answer my questions, take my calls, and give me direction. Instead, I felt more like the blind leading the blind in the dark. I know I felt alone, scared, stressed, overwhelmed, anxious, and oftentimes extremely depressed. At first it was both cathartic and therapeutic to create content—blogs and posts—about coping with divorce. It served as its own "exposure therapy" for me. Exposing oneself to the very triggers that cause anxiety, fear, stress, and PTSD in the first place can sometimes help people resolve them. It was empowering to think of how I could put my experience to use helping people in need. 

How did your Bennington education shape your career path? 

I studied Dance at Bennington and took a bunch of classes in psychology. My dance background led me to my first yoga class during Field Work Term in New York City. After graduation, I got my certification to teach yoga, as well as my licensed massage therapy certification. I've always been interested and involved in the healing arts. Everything I do in my life is seen through the lens of yoga, Buddhism, psychology, and 12-Step Recovery. I'm always looking for an easier, softer way to move through life. 

Describe your typical work day. 

There is no typical workday because, in addition to my work as a divorce doula, I am also a yoga teacher and a mother. But in my work with clients, I help with anything that comes up. People need that extra ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on. We work through the details together one by one: custody, infidelity, division of assets, and parenting. My practice is truly holistic, so I provide coaching, support, movement, and mindfulness. My clients and I celebrate their wins, and I cheer them on. 

What do you find most rewarding about your work? 

The most rewarding aspect of the work is when the light goes back on and people feel empowered, courageous, and ready to move forward with their lives. Sometimes the fear of the unknown outweighs the gravity and depth of what's actually happening. It's exciting to see them flip the script.

What did you learn at Bennington that you still use in your everyday life?

Some of the biggest lessons I learned at Bennington were the importance of following your passions and never giving up on your hopes and dreams. I used to choreograph dances and be in other people's work, so collaboration, connection, and a strong sense of community are key to my well being. Nobody should ever have to feel like they are alone. These are some of the many reasons I have found myself partnering with clients to improve their wellness.